Have you ever wondered why you always walk on eggshells around your partner? According to studies, an estimated 1% of the population is affected by narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) (American Psychiatric Association, 2013). Recognizing the signs of narcissistic behavior can help you protect yourself and take the necessary steps toward a healthier relationship.

What is Narcissism?

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a mental condition characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others. People with NPD may come across as arrogant, self-centered, and demanding (Mayo Clinic, 2017).

Signs You Are in a Relationship with a Narcissist

Lack of Empathy

Narcissists often struggle to empathize with others. If you feel down and share your feelings with your partner, they might dismiss your emotions or shift the conversation back to themselves (Burgo, 2015).

Need for Constant Admiration

Narcissists crave constant praise and validation. If your partner regularly seeks compliments and gets upset when they don't receive enough attention, this could be a sign of narcissism (American Psychiatric Association, 2013).

Manipulative Behavior

Manipulation is a common tactic used by narcissists. For instance, they might use gaslighting, making you question your reality and sanity to maintain control over you (Stern, 2018).

Sense of Entitlement

Narcissists believe they deserve special treatment. They might expect you to cater to their needs without reciprocating. For example, they may demand your time and resources while offering little in return (Mayo Clinic, 2017).

Exploiting Others

Narcissists often exploit others to achieve their own goals. They might use people as stepping stones to get what they want, with little regard for the other person's feelings or well-being. For example, they might take credit for your achievements to boost their status (Burgo, 2015).

Grandiosity

A narcissist's exaggerated sense of self-importance can manifest in various ways. They may boast about their achievements and talents, often exaggerating them to gain admiration and respect (American Psychiatric Association, 2013).

Lack of Accountability

Narcissists rarely take responsibility for their actions. They often blame others for their problems and refuse to admit when they are wrong, making it difficult to resolve conflicts healthily (Stern, 2018).

Impact on the Victim

Being in a relationship with a narcissist can have severe emotional and psychological effects. Partners of narcissists often feel confused, anxious, and filled with self-doubt. The constant manipulation and lack of empathy can erode self-esteem and lead to significant emotional distress (Stines, 2018).

Steps to Take if You Suspect Your Partner is a Narcissist

Seek Support

Talking to trusted friends, family, or therapists can provide valuable perspective and support. It's important to have a support system when dealing with a narcissist (McBride, 2008).

Set Boundaries

Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries is crucial. Narcissists often push boundaries to maintain control, so being firm and clear about your limits can help protect your mental health (Burgo, 2015).

Prioritize Self-Care

Taking care of your well-being is essential. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation and ensure you care for your physical, emotional, and mental health. This includes hobbies, exercise, and time with supportive people (McBride, 2008).

Consider Professional Help

If the situation becomes too overwhelming, seeking help from a mental health professional can be beneficial. They can provide strategies for coping and help you navigate the complexities of the relationship (Stines, 2018). We have therapists at the Delaware Center for Counseling and Wellness who can help you break free from narcissistic relationships. Contact us today using the contact form or call 302-292-1334 x101. 

Evaluate the Relationship

Take a step back and assess if staying in the relationship is beneficial for your mental health. Sometimes, the healthiest choice is to leave the relationship to protect your well-being (Stern, 2018).

What Not to Do

Don't Try to Change Them

It's important to understand that you cannot change a narcissist. They need to recognize their behavior and seek help, which many are unwilling to do (Mayo Clinic, 2017).

Don't Expect Empathy

Narcissists lack empathy, so expecting them to understand your feelings will likely lead to disappointment. Focus on finding support from those who genuinely empathize with you (Stines, 2018).

Don't Neglect Your Own Needs

While dealing with a narcissist, it's easy to forget your own needs. Prioritize self-care and ensure you look after your well-being (McBride, 2008).

Recognizing the signs of narcissistic behavior in a relationship is crucial for your well-being. If you suspect your partner is a narcissist, seek support, set boundaries, and prioritize self-care. Remember, you deserve a healthy, supportive relationship.

If you believe you are in a relationship with a narcissist, don't hesitate to seek help. Contact friends, family, or a mental health professional to support you through this challenging time. Your well-being is paramount.

Additional Resources

For further information on NPD and support for dealing with narcissistic partners, consider exploring the following:

• Books: "Will I Ever Be Good Enough?" by Karyl McBride, "The Narcissist You Know" by Joseph Burgo
• Support Groups: Online forums and local support groups for victims of narcissistic abuse
• Articles and Websites: Sites dedicated to understanding and coping with narcissism, such as Psych Central and Psychology Today

References:

• American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.).
• Burgo, J. (2015). The Narcissist You Know: Defending Yourself Against Extreme Narcissists in an All-About-Me Age. Touchstone.
• McBride, K. (2008). Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers. Free Press.
• Mayo Clinic. (2017). Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
• Stern, R. (2018). The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life. Harmony.
• Stines, S. (2018). The Everything Guide to Narcissistic Personality Disorder: Professional, reassuring advice for coping with the disorder - at work, at home, and in your family. Adams Media.